Detransition, Baby
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- Create Date：2021-03-29 12:12:02
- Update Date：2025-09-06
- Status：finish
- Author：Torrey Peters
- ISBN：1788167201
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Summary
A whipsmart debut about three women—transgender and cisgender—whose lives collide after an unexpected pregnancy forces them to confront their deepest desires around gender， motherhood， and sex。
Reese almost had it all: a loving relationship with Amy， an apartment in New York City， a job she didn't hate。 She had scraped together what previous generations of trans women could only dream of: a life of mundane， bourgeois comforts。 The only thing missing was a child。 But then her girlfriend， Amy， detransitioned and became Ames， and everything fell apart。 Now Reese is caught in a self-destructive pattern: avoiding her loneliness by sleeping with married men。
Ames isn't happy either。 He thought detransitioning to live as a man would make life easier， but that decision cost him his relationship with Reese—and losing her meant losing his only family。 Even though their romance is over， he longs to find a way back to her。 When Ames's boss and lover， Katrina， reveals that she's pregnant with his baby—and that she's not sure whether she wants to keep it—Ames wonders if this is the chance he's been waiting for。 Could the three of them form some kind of unconventional family—and raise the baby together？
This provocative debut is about what happens at the emotional， messy， vulnerable corners of womanhood that platitudes and good intentions can't reach。 Torrey Peters brilliantly and fearlessly navigates the most dangerous taboos around gender， sex， and relationships， gifting us a thrillingly original， witty， and deeply moving novel。
Reese almost had it all: a loving relationship with Amy， an apartment in New York City， a job she didn't hate。 She had scraped together what previous generations of trans women could only dream of: a life of mundane， bourgeois comforts。 The only thing missing was a child。 But then her girlfriend， Amy， detransitioned and became Ames， and everything fell apart。 Now Reese is caught in a self-destructive pattern: avoiding her loneliness by sleeping with married men。
Ames isn't happy either。 He thought detransitioning to live as a man would make life easier， but that decision cost him his relationship with Reese—and losing her meant losing his only family。 Even though their romance is over， he longs to find a way back to her。 When Ames's boss and lover， Katrina， reveals that she's pregnant with his baby—and that she's not sure whether she wants to keep it—Ames wonders if this is the chance he's been waiting for。 Could the three of them form some kind of unconventional family—and raise the baby together？
This provocative debut is about what happens at the emotional， messy， vulnerable corners of womanhood that platitudes and good intentions can't reach。 Torrey Peters brilliantly and fearlessly navigates the most dangerous taboos around gender， sex， and relationships， gifting us a thrillingly original， witty， and deeply moving novel。
Reviews
Jason
，
（pending）（2021 - #1） 2） lgbt3） Enjoyment:"。。。Does detransition count the same as transition in terms of the respect it has to be given？" -says Katrina， p。 227。 （pending）（2021 - #1） 2） lgbt3） Enjoyment:"。。。Does detransition count the same as transition in terms of the respect it has to be given？" -says Katrina， p。 227。 。。。more
Devon
，
2。5 starsI feel it’s a case of “it’s not you， it’s me” with this book。 When I read a book I usually need either an entertaining plot or good characters and I just found this novel a bit boring and I wasn’t really interested in the characters。
Roz Milner
，
Moving and ultimately somber; I wanted to like it more than I did， but I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t well written and compelling。 I just can’t help think - would I invite these people over for dinner
Philip Kenner
，
“Wasn’t that the big lesson of transition， of detransitioning？ That you’ll never know all the angles， that delay is a form of hiding from reality。 That you just figure out what you want and do it？”This is one of my new favorite books。 It’s funny， upsetting， and razor sharp。 My little queer， gender confused heart leapt out of my chest on every other page。 The humanity with which Katrina， Reese， and Ames are drawn is immense and sprawling。 Peters writes her characters with a deep kindness， but she “Wasn’t that the big lesson of transition， of detransitioning？ That you’ll never know all the angles， that delay is a form of hiding from reality。 That you just figure out what you want and do it？”This is one of my new favorite books。 It’s funny， upsetting， and razor sharp。 My little queer， gender confused heart leapt out of my chest on every other page。 The humanity with which Katrina， Reese， and Ames are drawn is immense and sprawling。 Peters writes her characters with a deep kindness， but she never gives up the opportunity to skewer the shit out of them。 We should all be afraid of being represented in a Torrey Peters novel: what a sick thrill to be totally seen， in all of our gorgeous and humiliating ways。“Detransition， Baby” is an Olympic feat of character development， plot， and hilarity。 I laughed out loud a few times。 “Wigs。。。 fun！” 。。。more
Ava Goepfert
，
I think this was more a 3。5 for me。 I learned so much， but that's part of the problem with this book: it did a lot of telling instead of showing。 Half the book felt more like a lecture than a story。 I felt like I never got to really understand any of the characters; they all kept their distance - perhaps that was intentional。 One of more unique books I've read。 I think this was more a 3。5 for me。 I learned so much， but that's part of the problem with this book: it did a lot of telling instead of showing。 Half the book felt more like a lecture than a story。 I felt like I never got to really understand any of the characters; they all kept their distance - perhaps that was intentional。 One of more unique books I've read。 。。。more
Martha
，
Columbus Dispatch Best Seller List
Evanna
，
whew， the rollercoaster of emotions I just went through！ Messy and brilliantly written。 ❤️
Ashley
，
I appreciated the perspectives this book offered。 The pacing was excellent and the plot was compelling。
Marie
，
I like the characters， I love the plot and everything about this book。 Good job writer！ If you have some great stories like this one， you can publish it on NovelStar， just submit your story to hardy@novelstar。top or joye@novelstar。top
tasneem
，
4。5！ this book was so good。 like， these characters！ these characters！ they were so messy and unpredictable and human。 i can't remember the last time i read characters that were this complex but still incredibly easy to empathise with。 the premise / plot were super engaging and fun to follow — even though its by no means a simple tale it never felt contrived or convoluted， though i wish the ending was a little less ambiguous。 the writing style wasn't a complete breeze to get through but it had so 4。5！ this book was so good。 like， these characters！ these characters！ they were so messy and unpredictable and human。 i can't remember the last time i read characters that were this complex but still incredibly easy to empathise with。 the premise / plot were super engaging and fun to follow — even though its by no means a simple tale it never felt contrived or convoluted， though i wish the ending was a little less ambiguous。 the writing style wasn't a complete breeze to get through but it had so much personality and detail， which i'm a big fan of。 mainly i just love all the questions this book asked and how multi-dimensional these discussions were， like they felt properly grounded in reality。 i feel like most fiction takes the idea of gender for granted — and most of us， too， for that matter — so i'm glad that i got to read a book which really attempts to confront that question。 。。。more
Lily Emerson
，
Five is not enough stars。 This is off the star scale。Detransition， Baby offers searing commentary on gender， femininity， womanhood， and motherhood， without ever sacrificing a truly engaging plot。 I’m a queer cis woman and there were observations about my gender and sexuality that I was absolutely not expecting but that hit HOME。 In the best possible way。 Reading Didion and the Unified Theory of Female Pain？ Ok， I see you see me。But overall this is just a really good novel！ Reece and Ames will be Five is not enough stars。 This is off the star scale。Detransition， Baby offers searing commentary on gender， femininity， womanhood， and motherhood， without ever sacrificing a truly engaging plot。 I’m a queer cis woman and there were observations about my gender and sexuality that I was absolutely not expecting but that hit HOME。 In the best possible way。 Reading Didion and the Unified Theory of Female Pain？ Ok， I see you see me。But overall this is just a really good novel！ Reece and Ames will be with me forever。 The story is amazing。 It’s incredibly well told。OBSESSED。 。。。more
Ja'Nean Palacios
，
I really liked this book。
Ellie
，
a complex and tender portrait of queers and their chosen families， parenthoods， genders， friendships。。。 lots to think about here， I'll be chewing on it for awhile！ a complex and tender portrait of queers and their chosen families， parenthoods， genders， friendships。。。 lots to think about here， I'll be chewing on it for awhile！ 。。。more
Chloe
，
3。5 stars， rounded up。 This took me so much longer to get through than I wanted， but strangely that's not for lack of liking this book。 I did like it and I also liked the conversation between Torrey Peters and Roxane Gay about its themes and questions。 This is not the kind of novel I normally pick up （women who are described as messy in the jacket cover， probing the concept of motherhood， are rarely well portrayed） but I am glad I did as this is the exception。There are many profound moments in t 3。5 stars， rounded up。 This took me so much longer to get through than I wanted， but strangely that's not for lack of liking this book。 I did like it and I also liked the conversation between Torrey Peters and Roxane Gay about its themes and questions。 This is not the kind of novel I normally pick up （women who are described as messy in the jacket cover， probing the concept of motherhood， are rarely well portrayed） but I am glad I did as this is the exception。There are many profound moments in this story that are heartbreaking in their authenticity; I really felt for these characters and their messiness。 There is such an internal excavation going on within a trans person's mind and Torrey Peters honors that by not leaving anything unsaid。 I liked the ambiguous ending more than I thought I would （mostly because I didn't predict it） and because the reason for my 3。5 star rating is my incredulity at the idea of this "plot": as long as it was a foil for character studies， then I was okay with it。 If it was to be a driving force， however， I would have a hard time looking away from how utterly chaotic all these characters' choices are。 Utterly chaotic also describes the writing for me。 There were many passages I enjoyed and there were also many metaphors that went on for。。。 pages， all of which could have been a sentence。 Still， I admire this novel for its incisiveness and its kindness toward humans just trying to find healing and fulfillment in this world。 。。。more
lark benobi
，
This novel is certainly written well， and I could honestly say it was great， but it also made me feel smarmed on， which is a verb I just made up to describe this particular reading experience （to be smarmed on （v）: to be subjected to excessive， ingratiating， self-absorbed wheedling， by a smarmer （noun: one who smarms）。 It's very well-done smarming， though。 And even if it's way too excessive for -me-， for other people it will be just the right amount of excessiveness， or they may not even find it This novel is certainly written well， and I could honestly say it was great， but it also made me feel smarmed on， which is a verb I just made up to describe this particular reading experience （to be smarmed on （v）: to be subjected to excessive， ingratiating， self-absorbed wheedling， by a smarmer （noun: one who smarms）。 It's very well-done smarming， though。 And even if it's way too excessive for -me-， for other people it will be just the right amount of excessiveness， or they may not even find it excessive at all， and also thank God a trans woman has finally been nominated for the Women's Prize。 About time。 Now somebody please write me a story with trans people that's about more than screwing and gender。 。。。more
Elizabeth Manning
，
Would give 4。5 stars if I could。 Extremely enlightening。 Learned a lot and learned that there's an ocean full of things I don't know or haven't wrapped my head around about gender， sexuality， love， what being a friend， a lover， a parent， a child is and means。 Highly recommend。 Would give 4。5 stars if I could。 Extremely enlightening。 Learned a lot and learned that there's an ocean full of things I don't know or haven't wrapped my head around about gender， sexuality， love， what being a friend， a lover， a parent， a child is and means。 Highly recommend。 。。。more
Tanya
，
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers。 To view it， click here。 I wanted to read the first couple of pages before going to bed a couple days ago， and ended up reading the first 50。I'm looking forward to reading other reviews and hearing opinions at book club。 ~spoilers below！~（view spoiler）[ I was very much rooting for them to be a family at the end but get why the author left it ambiguous （hide spoiler）] I wanted to read the first couple of pages before going to bed a couple days ago， and ended up reading the first 50。I'm looking forward to reading other reviews and hearing opinions at book club。 ~spoilers below！~（view spoiler）[ I was very much rooting for them to be a family at the end but get why the author left it ambiguous （hide spoiler）] 。。。more
Sophia
，
Detransition， Baby by Torrey PetersPublished January 12， 2021 Roxane Gay's Audacious Book Club Pick<3 These folks were raunchy and messy AF。 However， the subjects addressed were quite eye opening and thought provoking from a philosophical standpoint。 It really was unexpected--this was so well done and an excellent read/audiobook。 <3 #CisGender #LGBTQ+ #TransCommunity #Relationships #StereoTypingReese almost had it all: a loving relationship with Amy， an apartment in New York City， a job she didn Detransition， Baby by Torrey PetersPublished January 12， 2021 Roxane Gay's Audacious Book Club Pick<3 These folks were raunchy and messy AF。 However， the subjects addressed were quite eye opening and thought provoking from a philosophical standpoint。 It really was unexpected--this was so well done and an excellent read/audiobook。 <3 #CisGender #LGBTQ+ #TransCommunity #Relationships #StereoTypingReese almost had it all: a loving relationship with Amy， an apartment in New York City， a job she didn't hate。 She had scraped together what previous generations of trans women could only dream of: a life of mundane， bourgeois comforts。 The only thing missing was a child。 But then her girlfriend， Amy， detransitioned and became Ames， and everything fell apart。 Now Reese is caught in a self-destructive pattern: avoiding her loneliness by sleeping with married men。Ames isn't happy either。 He thought detransitioning to live as a man would make life easier， but that decision cost him his relationship with Reese—and losing her meant losing his only family。 Even though their romance is over， he longs to find a way back to her。 When Ames's boss and lover， Katrina， reveals that she's pregnant with his baby—and that she's not sure whether she wants to keep it—Ames wonders if this is the chance he's been waiting for。 Could the three of them form some kind of unconventional family—and raise the baby together？This provocative debut is about what happens at the emotional， messy， vulnerable corners of womanhood that platitudes and good intentions can't reach。 Torrey Peters brilliantly and fearlessly navigates the most dangerous taboos around gender， sex， and relationships， gifting us a thrillingly original， witty， and deeply moving novel。 。。。more
Jyotsna
，
Actual Rating: 4。7 stars “I think it’s the opposite，” he says too sharply。 “The whole reason transsexuals transition is because gender matters so incredibly much。” This book is such a raw， well-written， radical read。 It's trans 101 coupled with so much more; honestly， I learnt a lot about the trans community in general through the book。The book starts off with Reese， who is a trans woman and Ames who was a trans woman but detransitioned back to being a male。 The plot line is well planned and tho Actual Rating: 4。7 stars “I think it’s the opposite，” he says too sharply。 “The whole reason transsexuals transition is because gender matters so incredibly much。” This book is such a raw， well-written， radical read。 It's trans 101 coupled with so much more; honestly， I learnt a lot about the trans community in general through the book。The book starts off with Reese， who is a trans woman and Ames who was a trans woman but detransitioned back to being a male。 The plot line is well planned and thought out such that the raw emotions of our characters are outplayed in various ways。 The book also talks about a baby， around which the whole story is based。 Back when he lived as a trans woman， hardly anyone spoke about detransition。 It was treated as the purview of conversion therapists and tabloid headlines: He Was a Man， Then a Woman， Then Back to a Man！ The topic of detransition was boring—the reasons for it were never complex: Life as a trans woman was difficult and so people gave up。 Even worse， to discuss the possibility of detransition gave hope to the lunacy of bigots who wished that trans women would simply detransition （i。e。， cease to exist in any kind of visible， and hence meaningful， way）。 The best part about the book is the way detransition is spoken about， because while we know about transgenders， there is no real talk about detransitioning to the sex you were born as。 If only cis heterosexuals would realize that， like trans women， the activity in which they are indulging is a big self-pleasuring lie that has little to do with their actual personhood， they’d be free to indulge in a whole new flexible suite of hot ways to lie to each other。 It's the society that creates gender norms for you， and sex and gender do not always match for many people。 “The only people who have anything worthwhile to say about gender are divorced cis women who have given up on heterosexuality but are still attracted to men。” The only reason this is not a full five from me is because of the end。 Read the book to know what I mean。 In Conclusion:Just read it already！ 。。。more
Logan Hughes
，
This is one of the only books I've ever read which felt like it was intended to be read by trans people， and cis people can figure it out， instead of the other way around。 Torrey Peters tackles the kinds of issues people usually avoid talking about - detransition， divorce， death - and goes straight for them fearlessly。 She has a knack for talking about complex topics with devastating straightforwardness， emotional nuance， and sardonic wit。Stray ObservationsThe provocative title， which reads init This is one of the only books I've ever read which felt like it was intended to be read by trans people， and cis people can figure it out， instead of the other way around。 Torrey Peters tackles the kinds of issues people usually avoid talking about - detransition， divorce， death - and goes straight for them fearlessly。 She has a knack for talking about complex topics with devastating straightforwardness， emotional nuance， and sardonic wit。Stray ObservationsThe provocative title， which reads initially like an order， is actually in the context of the book more of a comma separated list。One of the main characters has some problematic beliefs informed by her particular traumas and biases as a white trans woman， theorizing， for example， that trans women of color have it easier because they have stronger community ties （she is called on this）， or the idea that being a victim of domestic violence is gender-affirming。 I believe that the author is not endorsing these ideas， but it's not always obvious which of Reese's ideas are meant to be bitingly true social commentary and which are meant to be evidence of her deeply fucked up worldview。 I didn't think that the flashbacks were necessary。 I found that they interrupted the flow， and that they didn't fill in more than I was able to infer in the main storyline （though I suppose additional background might be useful to the Cis。） I preferred the way Katrina's backstory was filled in， through her own storytelling in conversation， so that it was both informational and a scene of relationship-building。（view spoiler）[How about that ambiguous ending？！ I can't decide if it's trying to have things both ways， a happy and a sad ending， or if it's an artfully abrupt ending at the soonest possible place after things irrevocably fall apart， all the castles in the air dashed， the way so many big beautiful quixotic queer off-the-beaten-path life plans end prematurely， because the world is relentlessly hostile to anything outside the established script and/or the people in them don't really believe themselves that it will work and keep one foot out the door。 I don't really believe that this story ends with these three people teaching a little kid to play catch， so I guess ambiguous is about as happy as it can get。 （hide spoiler）] 。。。more
Leah Ford
，
It's a breath of fresh air to read a book by a trans author that's not written to/for a cis audience。 Peters delves into the real complexity of trans identity and parenthood， and it isn't always pretty。 Such a good read。 It's a breath of fresh air to read a book by a trans author that's not written to/for a cis audience。 Peters delves into the real complexity of trans identity and parenthood， and it isn't always pretty。 Such a good read。 。。。more
Kai
，
Absolutely loved it。
Carey
，
My friend Rhiannon and I decided to do a buddy read of this after hearing Sam Sanders interview Peters on the podcast It's Been a Minute。 Goddamn， this book is so good， and reading it in real time with a friend after a year of little to no social interaction with anyone is exactly what I needed。First， this book is just plain so good。 I don't read a lot of real life contemporary fiction， but I know craft expertise when I see it。 I feel about this book the way I do about Trust Exercise by Susan Ch My friend Rhiannon and I decided to do a buddy read of this after hearing Sam Sanders interview Peters on the podcast It's Been a Minute。 Goddamn， this book is so good， and reading it in real time with a friend after a year of little to no social interaction with anyone is exactly what I needed。First， this book is just plain so good。 I don't read a lot of real life contemporary fiction， but I know craft expertise when I see it。 I feel about this book the way I do about Trust Exercise by Susan Choi - crazy in love with the story， characters， and writing style。 But this book also hit me in the feels in unexpected ways。 I'm a cis straight passing lady who has always had an antagonistic relationship with gender - all gender， not just my own。 So I expected a lot of deep gender feels， and I definitely had some， but this book ultimately affirmed the shitshow that is Western gender presentation。 I took comfort in that。 I cried a few times over parental stuff though。 I was raised by a mother with borderline personality disorder and am childless by choice in large part because of that。 But like Ames having a hard time with the idea of fatherhood， I have never for a single second of my life been comfortable with motherhood。 That has never bothered me about myself， but Ames made me feel well and truly seen， and also made me hope for a future where family is defined by something other than money and power。 I mean， what if we had other options？ What if we cultivated all of the in-between relationships alongside the socially and financially acceptable ones？ What if we had real choices？ This book is so good。 It's going to stick in my brain for a long time。 。。。more
Traci O'Dea
，
I love the messiness of this book。 The realness。 And then， the possibility。 The characters challenge being defined by others or by harmful systems while also maintaining their individuality， flaws， sensuality， and complexity。 This novel is surprising and honestly raw。 I look forward to reading more insightful prose by Torrey Peters。
Nicole
，
Actual rating 3。5/5。
Caroline Tew
，
I have complicated feelings about this book。 At its heart， its a character study of 3 people: a trans woman， a man who has recently detransitioned from trans womanhood， and a cis woman。 They're all brought together with the shared hope that they just possibly might be able to raise a child together。 Honestly the stuff in the present day wasn't particularly interesting or plot forward， but I really enjoyed the deep dives into their pasts。 I think I learned a lot about how some trans people feel a I have complicated feelings about this book。 At its heart， its a character study of 3 people: a trans woman， a man who has recently detransitioned from trans womanhood， and a cis woman。 They're all brought together with the shared hope that they just possibly might be able to raise a child together。 Honestly the stuff in the present day wasn't particularly interesting or plot forward， but I really enjoyed the deep dives into their pasts。 I think I learned a lot about how some trans people feel about trans issues， something I （embarrassingly） haven't done as much of as I'd thought。 Honestly， it gave me an appreciation for how little I think about my gender in day-to-day life。 Obviously in certain scenarios I'm aware of my womanhood and how that plays into the gender dynamics of a situation， but in general I don't dissect every single thing nor do I think about it that often。 It was really illuminating and interesting to see the observations of these characters who do look critically at gender roles in almost every single situation they're a part of。 I think what docked it a star was just how much sex there was （I'm just not into books that are so sex heavy）， the main premise seemed so out there that at times it really felt like a convenient reason to bring these 3 people together， and at times the writing was a bit indulgent （a 3 minute metaphor about Ames sexuality as elephants？ too much）。 Definitely glad I read it though and I'd encourage more people to read it！ 。。。more
Michael Schultheis
，
Very boring。 DNF with just 2 chapters left。 Just didn’t have it in me to finish it。 Skimmed quickly through the last two chapters to get a basic idea of how it ends。 Just meh
Shannon Hall
，
I learned so much from this。 It's an emotional， nuanced， difficult， raw， no-holds-barred story， and it goes pretty hard the whole time。 So much about gender and sexuality and motherhood and more。 I'll be thinking about it for a while。 I learned so much from this。 It's an emotional， nuanced， difficult， raw， no-holds-barred story， and it goes pretty hard the whole time。 So much about gender and sexuality and motherhood and more。 I'll be thinking about it for a while。 。。。more
Fionnuala
，
Making face scrubs with a real estate agent？ Is this cis culture？Many people think a trans woman's deepest desire is to live in her true gender， but actually it is to always stand in good lighting。The best way to be a mother is to do so with as many other moms around as possible。 Making face scrubs with a real estate agent？ Is this cis culture？Many people think a trans woman's deepest desire is to live in her true gender， but actually it is to always stand in good lighting。The best way to be a mother is to do so with as many other moms around as possible。 。。。more
Julia B
，
Loved this book and found the characters extremely compelling。 I will definitely be recommending and re-reading this novel。
Reference
google book https://www.google.com/search?tbm=bks&q=Detransition, Baby
hathitrust digital library https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/ls?q1=Detransition, Baby&field1=ocr&a=srchls&ft=ft&lmt=ft
The British Library https://bll01.primo.exlibrisgroup.com/discovery/search?query=any,contains,Detransition, Baby&tab=LibraryCatalog&search_scope=Not_BL_Suppress&vid=44BL_INST:BLL01&lang=en&offset=0